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The police officer wrote into his report the event that lead up to the incident
Her husband walked into Victoria 's Secret
to purchase a sheer negligee for
his wife. He is shown several possibilities that range from
$250 to $500
in price -- the more sheer, the higher the price.
Naturally, he opts for
the most sheer item, pays the $500, and takes it home. He
presents it to
his wife and asks her to go upstairs, put it on, and model it for him.
Upstairs the wife thinks (she's no dummy-), 'I have
an idea. It 's so sheer that it might as well be
nothing. I won't put it on, but I'll do the modeling
naked, return it tomorrow, and keep the $500 refund for
myself.'
She appears naked on the balcony and strikes a pose. The
husband says, 'Good Grief! You'd think for $500,
they'd at least iron it !'
He never heard the shot.
Funeral on Thursday at Noon . Closed coffin.
A girl was a prostitute, but she did not want her grandma to know. One day the police raided a whole group of prostitutes at a sex party in a hotel and she was among them. The police took them outside and had all the prostitutes line up along the driveway.
Suddenly the girl's grandma came by and saw her. ''Why are you standing in line, dear?'' she asked. Not willing to let her grandma know the truth, the girl told her that the policemen were passing out free oranges. ''Why, that is awfully nice of them! I think I'll get some for myself,'' said the grandma.
A policeman went down the line, asking for information from all of the prostitutes. When he got to Grandma, he exclaimed, ''Wow, still going at it at your age? How do you do it?''
Grandma replied, ''Oh, it's easy, dear. I just take out my dentures and suck them dry!''
There were three men at a bar. One man got drunk and started a fight with the other two men. The police came and took the drunk guy to jail. The next day the man went before the judge. The judge asked the man, “Where do you work?”
The man said, “Here and there.”
The judge asked the man, “What do you do for a living?”
The man said, “This and that.”
The judge then said, “Take him away.”
The man said, “Wait, judge when will I get out?”
The judge said to the man, “Sooner or later.”
When I was 18 years old, one of my older brothers, he took me aside, and he told me he was gay. So, I called the police. I said, 'Could you send over a cop car? My brother's a homosexual.' They said, 'Sir, we cannot send over a cop car just because your brother is gay.' I said, 'Please? He loves a man in uniform, and it's his birthday. I want it to be a surprise.'
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